


The Dismemberment of Kotep Fenn

by Oh_DAMNeron



Category: Star Wars Prequel Trilogy, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Airplane Crashes, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Amputation, Anger, Angst, Cody is very protective over Kotep, Codywan is a background ship, Here we get a glimpse of Obi's parental instinct, Hurt/Comfort, Loss of Limbs, Original Character(s), Phantom Limb Pain, Phantom pain, Soft codywan content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-23
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:20:57
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,515
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24331987
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Oh_DAMNeron/pseuds/Oh_DAMNeron
Summary: Jedi Padawan, Kotep Fenn, suffers a horrific crash that leaves him scarred and mutilated. He is quick to be pessimistic about his unfortunate situation and it takes much convincing from many different people to get him on his feet again.This is Kotep's recovery story.____________________________________(Please read beginning notes on first chapter for a brief context statement as this is a canon divergent oc fic)
Relationships: CC-2224 | Cody/Obi-Wan Kenobi
Comments: 12
Kudos: 19





	1. The Accident

**Author's Note:**

> Context statement:  
> This is a fic for an au that a friend and I have going. We both created OCs and threw them into the chaos. My OC is Kotep Fenn, a male Padawan of Mandalorian descent. He is Obi-Wan's Padawan. Kotep would be around 16 during this fic.  
> My friends OC is Tilano Ral'Dami, a female Savarian Padawan to Anakin Skywalker. Tilano is around 17-18 in this fic as she is slightly older than Kotep.  
> Ahsoka Tano is still in this story, but she is the Padawan of Plo Koon because that is who I felt she would be best with aside from Anakin.

Kotep Fenn cut the thrusters in a last-ditch effort to avoid the crash. His already heavily damaged fighter ship collided with an enemy droid carrier with staggering force sending him careening towards the surface. He jerked the controls to the left and tried to escape a head-on crash only resulting in the entire left side of his starfighter caving in on him. He felt the metal of the fighter ship dig into his leg and he cried out as his ship plummeted. He was trapped. If he tried to eject it would tear his leg off. He managed to hit the radio transmitter and relay a panicked distress signal before it went static as the ship struck the ground leaving a small crater around him.

Commander Cody of the 212th attack battalion was racing across the planet's surface on a speeder when he saw the ball of flame descend from the sky and felt the wave of heat as it crashed through the trees nearby. Distress washed over him as he realised who it was that had crashed. His General's Padawan, Kotep. Cody quickly addressed the two troopers he was scouting with and they followed him towards the crash site. Kicking the speeder into top gear he weaved between trees, feeling the heat increase as he got closer and closer. 

There were burning trees crackling and snapping as they found their resting place amongst the twisted metal of what used to be a fighter. Cody hit the break hard and skidded to a halt, giving his troops a small command of "Cover me". He was already off the speeder before it fully stopped and was rushing towards what would have been the cockpit of the ship. 

It was crumpled in on itself, jagged and sharp. Inside, Cody could see a very bloodied and unconscious boy. He felt a surge of adrenaline at the sight of Kotep's state and pried the ship open. He gave Kotep a quick one over, gauging his condition. He checked his pulse and breathing. It was incredibly faint, but that meant that he had a chance.

Then he noticed the leg. 

He gingerly put his gloved hand to where the fighters metal had embedded itself deep into his leg and tried to devise the best course of action. He sent a quick ping signal to the medical ship to alert them that he needed urgent help. He took a deep breath before attempting to cleave the metal away from Kotep's leg enough to pull him free. 

He ducked as he heard his troopers blasters fire, shouting a loud "They found us!" over the blaster sounds.

Cody continued to try and pull the metal away and it took a few more tries to fully free Kotep's leg from the wreckage. Once he was no longer trapped, Cody lifted him up and over his shoulder. 

He set him down gently on the grass a few yards away from the burning starfighter. He then proceeded to fire at the oncoming droids. 

He pressed the transmitter on his wrist guard and held it close to his helmet, shouting over the battleground sounds that had erupted around him.

"This is Commander Cody, we need an evac! Padawan Kotep is down, he won't make it without medical aid! Get down here ASAP!" He then proceeded to shout his coordinates and attempted to hold off the droids until a carrier could get here. 

A lucky droid had managed to land a shot on Cody as the carrier landed between the opposing forces. Cody felt the pain surge through his shoulder, from one side to the other and it burnt as he picked Kotep up and carried him as carefully as he could into the ship.

The doors closed behind him and Cody collapsed to the floor, trying to set Kotep down as carefully as he could in his pain. A medically trained clone rushed to his side, already inspecting the gunshot. He shoved him off roughly, pointing to Kotep "I'm fine, Kix! Help the kid!" 

The medical clone, Kix, quickly retracted his hands and stepped away, taken aback. But he didn't argue and quickly refocused to tend to the wounded Padawan. 

General Kenobi landed his starfighter in the hangar bay of the large Republic battleship. As soon as his feet hit the ground he was running. He had received a transmission from the medical wing that they had his Padawan in critical condition. As vital as the mission was, General Skywalker and his own Padawan, Tilano Ral'dami, had assured him that they could handle it and that Obi-Wan should check on his Padawan. Obi-Wan skidded through the halls, breaking into a sprint when he saw the door to the medical wing down the hall. He knew that it was protocol to always walk when around people under your command, but at this point, he didn't care. His Padawan was in critical condition, he didn't know how long he'd last. 

"General Kenobi, over here!" Kix waved him over to a bed that held Kotep. "The operating theatre is currently unavailable so we've got him in here for the meantime but he'll be undergoing surgery very soon to remove any shrapnel and debris that may have impaled him during the crash."

Obi-Wan put his hands gingerly on the side of the bed and watched his Padawan's chest rise ever so slightly before falling. Despite the mask pressed flush to his face providing oxygen, he was still having trouble breathing. He had been hooked up to multiple machines that were monitoring his vitals and there was a reassuringly steady, yet faint, beeping coming from the heart monitor. 

He tried to keep a professional facade but inside he was breaking. This boy, who he had grown incredibly close to, was unconscious in front of him silently fighting for his life and Obi-Wan couldn't help him. It broke his heart.

"Scans aren't revealing the most promising of results..." Kix trailed off, feeling his analysis wasn't being taken in.

Obi-Wan's face creased as he looked over the damage. Burns, bruises and cuts covered most of his Padawan's body but his gaze was drawn to his twisted and mangled left leg. The leg of his pants had been cut away, either by Kix or during the impact, and it revealed the long and deep gashes that ran ravines just below his knee. From the gashes and up to his mid-thigh was burnt and blistering. 

It was a mess. 

Obi-Wan didn't have high hopes. 

Commander Cody was in a chair next to Kotep, the medic droid, having already removed the upper half of Cody's armour, was dressing the blaster wound that had managed to just miss the bone.

"General..." Cody began but he didn't know how to continue; what could he even say.

Obi-Wan didn't take his eyes off of Kotep when he replied. "How are you feeling, Commander?" 

Cody felt his shoulders slump ever so slightly, looking back over the Padawan. "You shouldn't be worrying about me, General." 

He watched as his General closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He knew that he was reaching out with the force, but for what reason he wasn't sure. 

The medical droid that had practically attached itself to Cody's arm when he arrived was finally finished and moved away. His arm had been thoroughly disinfected and covered before being placed in a sling. Kix walked over to Cody, seeing that he was now free, and tapped at his datapad for a moment before addressing him.

"Commander, I'm taking you off of active duty-" 

"No. I'm needed out there, this is a war." Cody was obviously not pleased with the order but had managed to keep his voice steady and of adequate volume. 

"You know better than anyone that being reckless can get you killed. Running back into battle while injured, in your dominant arm mind you, is reckless." Kix took a deep breath, Cody opened his mouth to argue back but before he could, Kix continued on. "You're right, you are needed out there. So don't go getting yourself killed before this war is over. I'm saying this as a brother, Cody, rest. Take a week off and come back stronger."

"A week? That long?" Cody's voice was growing sterner and he was a hair away from pulling the rank card, which was more for intimidation than practicality as he knew Kix technically outranked him in these situations.

"Yes, and that's as short as I can possibly make it before putting your health at risk." Kix's voice softened, "Take the opportunity to have a break, Cody. Please." 

Cody pursed his lips, contemplating the orders from Kix. Until finally he found himself nodding. With Kotep down for the count, he might as well spend his time watching over the kid. Who knows when he'll wake up.

"Alright, Kix. A week, that's it. Then I'm back out there." He pointed at Kix, almost as if silently warning him of what consequences may follow if he wasn't allowed back onto the frontlines.

"Of course, Commander." Kix's face hid a small heroic smile of triumph, "One week."

Kix then excused himself and went to fuss over the other patients, leaving Cody to decide what to do in his newfound free time. He made his way to Obi-Wan's side, eyebrows furrowed as his General's features creased and he slowly opened his eyes. Cody knew better than to ask what he had seen.

They stood quietly by the bedside, waiting for a reason to move. 

Kotep saw only darkness for a moment.

Shapes slowly started to stir and form around him. A lake began to lap against the shore a little ahead of him and fuzzy mountains blurred into view in the distance. Large rocks were heavy against the earth around him and grass sprouted between his toes. He watched as the sun peeked over the mountain tops. Despite the glistening orange sun, his surroundings were set to a blurry, pale blue like early dawn. 

He saw a figure standing in the shallows of the lake. The figure’s hands were clasped neatly behind his back and he had his shoulders squared, watching the sun calmly. The top half of his grey hair was drawn back and secured at the back of his head while the lower half was left to fall freely down his back and over his shoulders. 

Kotep found himself moving forward without thinking. No one else was here, and he sensed that this man was here for a reason. The man wore traditional Jedi garb and had a lightsaber clipped to his hip. Kotep stopped just short of the lake, unsure if he wanted to intrude on what seemed to be a very private moment. 

"I was worried you wouldn't make it here." The man spoke without warning. His voice was deep and calming. "I'm sure you have many questions and they will all be answered in due time, young one."

Kotep didn't know what to say. He did have many questions, but he felt it wasn't his place to speak right now.

"Come, sit with me." The man moved from the water and over to one of the large rocks and took a seat. He gestured to Kotep to join him and he tentatively took a seat next to him. 

"Do you know who I am?" He asked gently. 

Kotep shook his head, almost embarrassed to not know.

A laugh rumbled deep in the man's chest, "How typical of Obi-Wan. You must be rather new, it takes a bit of time to get history out of him."

Kotep found himself tilting his head in confusion. How did this man know his master?

The man placed a hand on Kotep's shoulder, "I was Obi-Wan's master many many years ago, my name is Qui-Gon Jinn." He smiled so gently that Kotep was calm for a moment. But only a moment before fear set in.

"Am I dead?" Kotep was recalling what little memory he had and he wasn't quite sure how he had gotten here.

Qui-Gon breathed out slowly and gave him a pained smile, "Not yet, but if you don't fight to stay alive that may change." 

Kotep just looked forward and out over the lake and the blue landscape. He guessed it wouldn't be so bad to be dead if he got to stay here. But where was here? He decided to voice that concern and Qui-Gon smiled softly.

"From what I've been able to reason, this is a separate plane of existence. One that resides between life and death. It's incredibly ancient, I read about it when I was a Padawan, it was thought to be only a myth but I guess, since we are both standing here, it exists. Most force-sensitive beings can reach it if they are in need of it. I wasn't sure if you'd be able to reach it," Qui-Gon turned back to Kotep and gave him a genuine smile of pride, "and yet here you are. You're stronger than you think, little one." 

Kotep wasn't sure what to make of that, he did not feel worthy of the praise. So he sat quietly and looked back out over the horizon. It seemed he would spend a little longer here, listening to the wise words of a master of old and learning how to be calm for just a moment. 

This was his eye of the storm.


	2. The Awakening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Obi-Wan has to make a difficult decision and suffers the consequences.

Kotep had been rushed to the operation theatre two hours ago. He had just been brought back to the intensive care unit with an urgent report from Kix. Obi-Wan stood with the medical clone, gently stroking his beard in the anxious and tense motion he tended to do. Cody was still lingering around, unsure of what to do as he wasn't on duty. He had ended up deciding that his time was best spent watching over Kotep. 

"It's not good." Kix started slowly, trying to be gentle with the information as he could.

When Obi-Wan's expression didn't change, Kix took a deep breath and continued on.

"Most of the muscle and tissue of his lower leg has been completely torn. A lot of the bone is irreparable. There's very little we can do..." He clenched his jaw as he waited for Obi-Wan to reply. 

"And what you're saying is?" Kix could see the obvious pain painted over the General's face. 

Kix reluctantly carried on, "If, and only if, you give us the go-ahead... We amputate. Of course there are major risks with any sort of surgery of this scale, but it will save his life."

It was only a moment before Obi-Wan replied with a weak, "But at what cost."

There is a long while of contemplation and Cody finds himself wanting to whisk Obi-Wan away and talk about this somewhere else. His good hand is itching to rest itself gently on his General's shoulder and excuse them. 

"Do I have any time to think this over?" Obi-Wan closed his eyes and pressed his fingers to the bridge of his nose.

"I can give you an hour," he glanced at the time on his datapad and back at Kotep's vitals, "Two hours at the most. But we need to do something soon." 

Obi-Wan nodded solemnly before dismissing Kix and wandering away towards his quarters. Kix watched him go before looking back over to Cody, who's feet had stayed firmly planted, unwilling to follow. 

"He needs you, Commander, go with him." Kix gave Cody a pained smile.

Cody nodded, "Thank you, Kix." He wasn't sure what else to say so he left, following quickly behind Obi-Wan, catching up almost effortlessly. They did not speak a word to one another until they were in private where Cody gently reached for Obi-Wan's hand. He wanted to say something but, once again, wasn't sure where to start. So he did what he could and just offered comfort. 

"I don't know what to do, Cody." Obi-Wan muttered after a while. They were sitting on Obi-Wan's neatly made bed, hand in hand, almost unaware of the action.

"Alright, let's talk pros and cons." Cody suggested, "If we don't let them amputate and he happens to live, what then?" 

Obi-Wan bit his lip as he pondered quietly. "He lives a life of extraordinary pain, he may never be able to become a Jedi. He may have to leave the Jedi Order and everything he's been through has been for nothing. And that's only if he lives." 

"And if we give the go-ahead?" Cody frowned, he felt like he already knew the answer but he was not the one who could give the order. It had to come from Obi-Wan and Obi-Wan alone. 

"His life becomes infinitely harder. Once again, he may never be able to become a Jedi. But, he'll still have a chance if he can recover." Obi put his head in his hands while Cody shifted to rub circles into his back, trying to soothe the obvious storm roiling in his head. 

Obi-Wan let out a long groan as he ran his fingers up into his hair. He needed to come to a decision, and soon. Does he leave Kotep crippled? Or does he take away his choice by removing the leg? It's not like Kotep had much of a choice anyway, he had been placed in a medically induced coma proceeding the initial surgery. This removed any chance that he would wake up on his own accord and go into a state of shock, making everything worse. 

They sat together for what felt like forever, the tense energy in the room evident to even those without force sensitivity. After a long while, Obi-Wan straightened up, took a deep breath, and turned to Cody. 

"We need to contact his parents. I want them up to date with what's about to happen." He flicked his tongue over his teeth nervously, half dreading saying it because he knew if he did it would become reality, "I'm going to give the go-ahead, we'll amputate." 

Cody gave Obi-Wan as much of a comforting smile he could muster; it wasn't much. "I'll handle his parents, you go talk to Kix." Cody didn't  _ want _ to tell Kotep's parents about the surgery but he wasn't about to let his General take any more of the weight when Cody wasn't even on duty and could help.

Obi-Wan gave Cody a soft smile and a very gentle, "Thank you, Cody." Before he shakily got to his feet, ran his hand once more through his hair to tidy it, and strode out of the room with faux confidence. 

"What do I even say to them? How do I explain to them that their kid is about to go through life-threatening surgery without causing too much panic?" Cody was leaning against a wall in the hangar, talking animatedly to a worried Rex, who had just gotten back from the battle that was dying down below them.

"Why did you even say you'd do this?" Rex had his helmet tucked neatly under one arm and his other hand was resting comfortably on his sheathed blaster. 

"Because Obi-Wan has been through enough already, I can't ask him to inform Tep's parents about something of this magnitude!" Cody was rambling, trying to reason to himself why he'd accept something like this.

"Yet you thought you could handle this? You're just as attached to this kid as he is, whether be denies it or not. This is equally if not  _ harder _ for you considering what you two went through together on Corellia." Rex jabbed a finger at him, trying to get his point across.

"Don't remind me..." Cody ran his good hand over his face and groaned, Corellia was a dark time. An undercover mission assigned to Obi-Wan, Cody and a shiny Padawan Kotep, that had gone horribly wrong and had almost ended with their capture by the separatists. "I have to say something and this isn't easy news to break." 

Rex's demeanour changed to one of serious contemplation, obviously trying to think of some answer. Cody sighed but was glad that his brother was trying to help him. But before Rex could come up with some sort of answer, he heard yelling and looked over to see General Skywalker and his Padawan, Tilano, practically sprinting towards him. 

"Cody, what's the news on Kotep?" Anakin tried to steady his breathing.

Rex looked expectantly to Cody, who obviously had all the answers. Cody bit his lip before breaking a small portion of the news. He wasn't sure what he was allowed to be saying, and to be completely honest, he'd rather leave Anakin and Tilano to Obi-Wan. 

"He's currently in surgery. There was a crash, it's serious." 

Tilano's expression dropped, "He'll be alright, won't he?" 

Cody grimaced, "I'm not sure." 

Rex silently put a comforting hand on Cody's shoulder and Cody gave him a weak smile. As cadets they had been taught, similarly to the Jedi Code, to avoid any attachments as it may distract them on the battlefield. Cody knew very well the consequences of his attachment and it seemed so did Rex; pain and hurt. 

There was a long silence between the four of them before Cody finally broke it with a very small, and nervous, "I have to tell his parents." 

"We should probably leave you to do that, we've got a battalion to wrangle." There was a pause, "Actually it's more just Fives I have to wrangle. I'm sure you'll figure out what to say, Cody, you've always been good under pressure." Rex gently patted Cody on the shoulder once more before almost literally pulling Tilano and Anakin away with him. 

Cody breathed out slowly and stayed in place for another moment before he finally pushed off the wall and slowly began to wander back to his own quarters to get in contact with Kotep's parents. Arriving in his quarters he set his datapad on the small table and began to draft a formal message that would detail everything that has happened and will happen, or at least as far as he could speculate. 

Obi-Wan Kenobi sat alone in the medical bay, a hand pressed to his face as he mentally covered the pros and cons again, hoping he had made the right choice. It had been two hours since Kotep had been taken back into the operating theatre for the amputation. He was getting worried that it was taking too long and that something had gone wrong when he noticed Kix who had just arrived from the operating theatre.

"General." Kix was starting to get concerned for Obi-Wan's mental wellbeing. This was taking a heavy toll on him.

General Kenobi shot to his feet in an instant, preparing himself for the worst. He didn't say a word, he didn't trust himself to not fall apart, so he just let Kix talk.

"He'll be okay." 

Obi-Wan felt his legs almost give out on him with relief. His shoulders slumped slightly and he let out a shuddering breath. 

"That's good. That's very good. Thank you, Kix." 

"Just doing my job, sir." Kix gave him a reassuring smile, "We'll be keeping him in a private room in intensive care for the next few days so we can regularly monitor him and make sure his health doesn't decline. He'll be transferred to another private room in the Jedi Temple when we return to Coruscant. He'll start to wake up once the anaesthetic wears off. You're welcome to go sit with him if you wish." 

Obi-Wan nodded slowly, taking in the information. Kix was about to turn and leave before he continued on.

"Oh, and General, one more thing. I suggest you take Commander Cody with you if you go to see Padawan Kotep." And with that Kix was gone. 

Obi-Wan took a brief moment to steady himself and his breathing before he exited the waiting room to go find Cody in his quarters. 

Obi-Wan pressed the alert button on the Commander's quarters door and entered when he heard Cody's small "Come in."

Obi-Wan entered. He had only been in here a handful of times, what briefing or debriefing they had done in private was, for the most part, completed in Obi-Wan's quarters. He saw Cody sitting at his desk, his good hand lightly holding his shoulder, face slightly contorted in what Obi-Wan sensed to be pain. 

"Cody." Obi-Wan's voice was soft and caring. Seeing his Commander like this was causing him pain, but he would not admit that to anyone, not even himself. 

Cody went to stand up, but Obi-Wan was quick to wave him down, dismissing such a formal greeting.

"Sorry, General. Deep in thought." Cody lied. 

"It's alright, Commander. I have news about Kotep." Obi-Wan watched as Cody perked up. He made his way over to Cody's desk.

"What news?" His eyebrows creased, dread and fear filling his expression.

Obi-Wan leant against the wall, "He's out of surgery. Kix says he'll be okay." He took a deep breath and watched Cody close his eyes in relief. "He's in a private room and Kix has granted us permission to see him." 

Cody pushed his chair back and got to his feet, "Then we should go see him." 

Kotep sat on the soft grass, cross-legged, hands clasped in his lap, breathing deeply. Qui-Gon sat in front of him, back straight and deep in meditation. Kotep couldn't manage to reach such levels of concentration. He was endlessly worried and anxious to return back to his master. He had no idea what had become of him in reality and he was scared to ponder the possibilities. 

"I sense your anxiety," Qui-Gon muttered, eyes still closed and unmoving. 

"Is it that obvious." Kotep groaned and put his head in his hands.

Qui-Gon released a quick exhale of amusement before peaking open one eye and spying Kotep's distressed situation. 

"There is no need to fear going back. It's not your time to permanently leave the world of the living." 

Kotep frowned, "I understand that, master, but that doesn't mean I'm not scared. I have no idea what happened to me out there. What if I've  _ changed _ ." 

Qui-Gon leaned forward and placed a reassuring hand on Kotep's knee. "Things  _ will _ be changed, there's no doubt about it. But change is the way of the Force. It's always ebbing and flowing." As if to emphasise his point, the wind picked up around them, causing Qui-Gon's hair to gently sway. "There is no need to fear change, it can be scary, yes, but ultimately it helps you grow. Change is necessary whether it is desired or not."

Kotep frowned, turning this information over and over in his mind. Qui-Gon watched in interest, curious as to what conclusion the Padawan's mind would reach.

Kotep breathed deeply again before continuing, a different aspect of this all confusing him, "I don't know how to leave, though. I don't know how I got here in the first place."

"I've found that this place is controlled more by your will than anything else. It will pull you out when you're truly ready to return. Once you have accepted that you need to go back, it will make it so." Qui-Gon explained, plain and simple. 

Kotep exhaled slowly, trying once again to centre himself in the force, reaching out to the surrounding environment.

It was true, he didn't want to leave. But deeper down he felt a pull back to reality. Weak at first but growing stronger as he faced the fact that he needed to return. He was scared to face the reality that laid in front of him but he knew he couldn't stay here forever. It really wasn't his time to join Qui-Gon. 

Kotep got to his feet hesitantly, with Qui-Gon following his action. "As scared as I am of what became of me out there to have led me here, I need to return eventually. I can…  _ sense _ the other side and I know it's my time to go back."

Qui-Gon smiled sweetly and placed his hand on Kotep's shoulder. "Stay strong, young Kotep. The path ahead is going to be tough, and sometimes you'll feel like giving up, but don't let it discourage you. You're  _ strong _ , believe in your abilities and you will do just fine." 

"Thank you, Master. For everything." Kotep smiled back, but Qui-Gon was starting to fade from view and blur together with the surroundings. The pressure of Qui-Gon's hand disappeared and everything was dark, yet he felt in control again. It took a large amount of strength to open his eyes to the bright lights overhead. 

"General! He's awake!" 

Kotep rolled his head to the side, he felt heavy and sluggish, it was a drastic difference to how light and free he felt when he was with Qui-Gon. He spied a clone, but not just any clone, it was-

"Cody?" Kotep's words were drawled and mumbled but Cody heard them. 

"Hey, Tep." Cody was quickly by his side, with another familiar face lurking close behind him. 

"Master?" Kotep squinted, his eyes still focussing against the bright lights overhead. 

"Kotep, I'm so glad you're okay." Obi-Wan's eyes crinkled in a smile of relief. 

"Where am I?" He was remembering the crash. The burning heat he felt, the pain, the fear. "What happened to me?"

Cody's expression grew sad and he couldn't maintain eye contact, looking over to Obi-Wan.

He was silent for a moment, formulating the best response. "I assume you recall the crash?" 

Kotep nodded shakily. 

"You got hurt. Badly. But you're going to be okay, you just need to rest now. Everything else will be answered soon." 

Kotep's eyes welled up, he felt something was wrong. "Master..." His voice wavered and he was choking up. "What  _ happened _ to me?"

Obi-Wan watched him for a moment, almost as if he were unable to say the words. He bit at the inside of his cheek gently and dropped his gaze to the floor.

Cody reached for Kotep's hand, his eyes were wet and Kotep knew something really bad had happened. 

"All you need to know for now, kid, is that you're going to be okay. No matter the circumstances." Kotep clung to Cody's hand, squeezing it tight. Cody wouldn't let on how worried it made him that Kotep's grip wasn't quite as strong as it usually was.  _ He's just tired _ , Cody reassured himself.

Obi-Wan stepped away for a moment, calling for Kix through his communicator on his wrist. He waited by the door until he arrived and spoke briefly with him outside the room, relaying information that Kotep couldn't catch. It made him nervous and he felt Cody tighten his hold on his hand.

Kix walked into the room. Obi-Wan followed behind, his hand to his chin, contemplative, worried.

"Kotep, it's good to see you awake." Kix started, trying to soften the blow. "A lot has happened since the crash..." he fiddled with his datapad, checking Kotep's vitals and doing a quick once-over. 

"This won't be easy information to take in but you'll notice it sooner or later and I'd rather tell you and avoid you going into shock without someone here." Kix prefaced before taking a deep breath and starting to explain. "Kotep, the way you crashed... It completely crushed your left leg. We knew it wasn't good, but when we took you into the initial surgery we saw how bad it truly was. We tried, we did, but it was too mangled to save. The muscle and tissue were almost completely torn and the bone was shattered. It would just get infected and produce worse issues as you get older if you managed to survive through recovery. I'm so sorry, Kotep. We had to amputate your leg." 

Kotep was wide-eyed and frozen. He didn't believe what he was hearing. It couldn't be true. He tugged his hand free from Cody's rather roughly with what strength he had in him and awkwardly pushed himself into a sitting position, looking down at his legs. No,  _ leg _ . His face twisted into something resembling sadness and fear when his eyes landed on the void where his leg should be. He was afraid to move, afraid to touch it, afraid of what it would feel like. Or more so what it wouldn't feel like. 

It took all his will power and energy to shift enough to sit on the edge of the bed, facing Cody. He gently pulled back the sheets and saw what was left of his leg, heavily bandaged. His leg had been severed just below the knee. They had saved as much as they could but it was unsure if they would have to do revisions later. Kotep stared at his burnt and blistered skin, darker and a deep red in comparison to his usually already dark skin tone.

"Oh." He whispered. It was all he could think of saying. His mind had gone completely blank at the sight. While the word was small and spoken quietly, it travelled well in the silent room and Cody felt his heartbreak. Obi-Wan's brow furrowed deeply and he ignored the stinging in his eyes.

He felt everyone's eyes on him but he stayed still, afraid. 

"Tep... I'm sorry..." Cody went to reach for him but retracted his hand, unsure if his touch was wanted. 

Kotep couldn't take his eyes away from his leg. He was finding it harder and harder to breathe. He was suffocating until a sob wracked at his chest and he covered his face as he began to unravel and fall apart. Shoulders shaking and hands wet from tears, he coughed deep and something rattled in his chest. He wasn't in the best shape. 

He felt the bed dip beside him. "Kotep, this was my decision. Don't beat yourself up over this." Obi-Wan's gentle hand came to rest on his back and he tried to take a deep breath. 

"Why did you do this to me..." Kotep grumbled before raising his head and taking in a teary-eyed Obi-Wan. "Why did you do this to me!" 

Obi-Wan dropped his hand. He knew Kotep would be mad. "I didn't have much of a choice. Take it out on me, just don't feel like this was your fault." 

Kotep's face scrunched up as he fought more tears. "Why?" He cried out, "Why!?" He slammed his fists hard against Obi-Wan's chest, tugging roughly at Obi-Wan's undertunic before giving up the offensive to cry into his Master's chest. He was so tired. Obi-Wan wrapped his arms around him, taking a deep breath as Kotep shook violently within his hold. They clung to one another, Kotep feeling helpless and exhausted while Obi-Wan was doing all he could to soothe him. Kix silently excused himself, planning on coming back later to check on them. Cody rubbed at his face, trying to act strong but inside he was also falling apart. This small boy meant so much to him and the fact that he couldn’t help was devastating. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!!  
> Any and all comments are highly appreciated!!


	3. The Decision

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, Tilano Ral'dami is my friend's oc! She has traded spots with Ahsoka Tano, who in this au, is Plo Koon's Padawan.

It had been a few hours and Kotep had calmed down. That's not to say he had come to terms with what had been done to him, but he wasn't hysterical anymore. Kix had come to check up on him again and upped the dosage of painkillers before reassuring him that everything would be fine. Kotep didn't believe him. Cody stayed by Kotep's side the entire time, unwilling to leave him. He wasn't on duty nor did he have anything to tend to in his newfound free time, but even if he did, he felt he wouldn't have left Kotep anyway. 

"Hey kid, how are you feeling?" Kotep had been silent for a long while, for a moment Cody thought that perhaps Kotep was trying to sleep but he saw the shallow breathing and the pained look on his face and suddenly he knew better. 

“How do you think?” Kotep turned his head away from Cody, trying to fight against the stinging in his eyes. 

“It will all be okay, Tep, I promise.” Cody was trying his best, comforting someone wasn’t exactly in his coding. 

"But you don't know that!" He gritted his teeth and turned back to Cody. "Why does everyone insist on telling me that I'll be okay! I've had my life ripped away from me! I can't stand, let alone finish my training as a Padawan!" 

Cody frowned, "You're just angry. And you have every right to be angry. This makes everything tougher but believe me, you'll recover. It's only been, what, five hours since you woke up. You don't know what you're capable of yet, you could be completely fine and able to walk by next week!" 

Kotep was crying again and Cody's face fell. He felt for the kid, he really did, but he couldn't do anything to help him if he didn't already believe he could recover. 

"I'm sorry…" Kotep choked out, covering his face. 

"Hey, woah, kid. It's okay." Cody got up and sat next to him on the bed. "Kotep. It's alright." 

Kotep's shoulders shook. He felt horrible for yelling at Cody. Obi-Wan and Cody were the closest thing that Kotep had to a family within the Republic and his time as a Padawan. That's why he wasn't surprised when Cody pulled him close, threading his fingers into his beige blond hair and massaging the kid's scalp gently.

"I'm so sorry…" Kotep was shocked at how Cody could still be gentle with him even after he had gotten mad at Cody.

"Tep'ika, it's alright." Cody tried to act like he wasn't in pain with his injured arm squished between them. 

"No, no it's not…" Kotep cried, "I've been horrible to you. And to Master Obi-wan. I don't even know why you're still in here, I'm sure you've got better places to be." Despite his words, Kotep wrapped his arms around Cody and held on tight. 

He felt a small laugh rumble in Cody's chest. "Trust me, Tep, there's nowhere I'd rather be. You need someone here and I've been taken off of active duty. So you're stuck with me for now." 

Kotep was crying again but this time it wasn't from a place of anger or sadness. Kotep was relieved, loved, warm inside. He had thought Cody cared about him but he had made himself believe it was only in a professional standing, they worked together. But now he saw, truly saw, that Cody cared for him deeply, far beyond what was professionally acceptable. Kotep buried his face in Cody's shirt and tried to slow his breathing.

Tilano Ral'dami and Kotep Fenn were as close as Padawans could be. Both their masters, Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi were incredibly close and it was only a matter of time before their Padawans formed such a bond. 

"Tilano, you can't!" Kotep hears Kix yelling outside, "We've got a limit on how many visitors he can have. It's already too crowded in there, you'll have to come back later." 

Obi-Wan looked over to the door, a frown on his face at the commotion outside. Cody was close by his side with Anakin, Mace Windu and Rex on the other side of the bed. Kotep sitting awkwardly in the middle of them on his bed. He watched with mild amusement as Kix slid into view blocking the doorway. "Tilano, stop! We have regulations!" 

"It's been two days, Kix! Everyone else has been able to see him but me! Let me in!" Tilano was angry, and rightly so. She had been denied visitation rights to see her best friend multiple times and she had had enough. 

Obi-Wan knew that she would have been too much for Kotep when he had first woken up but he was quickly finding out that keeping them apart for longer was worse. 

Obi-Wan sighed and put a hand to his forehead, "Let her in, Kix." 

Tilano was already inside the moment Kix stood down. 

"Tep!" She shoved past the others, skidded to a halt by his bed and threw her arms around him. 

He had just got his arms around her before she pulled back and glared at him, "Thank the Maker, you're not dead! You had me so worried! You Kriffing idiot! What would I have done if you had gone and gotten yourself killed!" She took a breath, "I'm so glad you're okay!" And he was back in her arms.

Kotep was fighting tears when Obi-Wan finally decided to peel Tilano off of his Padawan, "Okay, stop crowding him." 

Tilano awkwardly shuffled aside but stayed as close as she could to Kotep. Anakin watched his Padawan, half glad that she finally got to see her friend, half wishing she wasn't here to witness this conversation. It was going to get heated, he could tell.

"Kotep, I'm here on behalf of the Jedi Council." Mace Windu began and Kotep cringed, "We need to talk about your injury and what that may do to your Padawan training." 

Out of his peripheral vision, Kotep saw Cody's eyebrows raise in fear and his gaze shifted to Kotep for a split second before regaining his composure. Obi-Wan’s hand instinctively began to nervously stroke his beard. Kotep closed his eyes for a long moment, not wanting to see the disappointment on everyone’s faces anymore. When he opened his eyes, he kept his focus on his lap, Mace took this as a cue to continue speaking. 

“You’re not being expelled from the Jedi Order, we have no right to do that on the grounds of an injury. However, this will make your training much harder. Kotep,” Mace paused until Kotep rose his gaze to meet his, “We are offering you an out if you don’t want to stay after what happened. The Jedi Order has taken so much from you already, we understand if you want to leave.” 

It wasn’t only the Jedi who could feel the tension in the room, Cody and Rex could feel the thick weight that hung between everyone, connecting them in a long moment of silence. 

Kotep’s eyebrows furrowed, mirroring a habit he had picked up from his master, and he considered the options. If he stayed he would have to work harder than he ever had to get back on top of his life and continue his training. If he left, he could go home, back to his parents, and recover at his own pace. He frowned, if he left, he would never see any of the people in this room again. He had formed somewhat of a family over the last year and a half of training with the Jedi Order. Obviously, Kotep was conflicted. 

"Can I have some time to think about this?" His voice wavered and he wasn't sure he trusted it not to crack.

Mace Windu, gave him a very small sad smile, "Of course, contact me when you've decided." And with that he excused himself and exited the room.

All eyes shifted to Kotep, who was obviously quite distressed. 

"Can I have a moment alone with my Padawan." Obi-Wan was the first to break the silence, he watched Kotep as their eyes locked. Kotep looked like he was about to burst into tears again. His gaze shifted back to his lap, ashamed.

Tilano reluctantly left the bedside and Anakin ushered her out of the room with him. Cody gave Obi-Wan a soft worried look before exiting behind Rex and closing the door. 

"What are you thinking, Kotep?" Obi-Wan took a seat on the end of the bed and faced him, offering his full attention. 

"That I should hate you. For what you did to me. But I don't. I can't. Because if you didn’t do it I would probably be dead right now." There was another moment of silence. There seemed to be a lot of them recently. "I'm sorry, Master, for everything. I just… I felt like I should apologise."

"Thank you, Kotep, but there was no need." Obi-Wan, ever the modest, muttered. 

"I don't know what to do, Master." Kotep's voice was low and laced with fear.

Obi-Wan remembered a time a couple days ago where he had said a similar thing to Cody. He'd been quite helpful then, and he wanted to be just as helpful for Kotep now. But in truth he wasn’t quite sure either, this wasn’t up to him, it was Kotep’s choice.

"I feel like I've let you down. If I quit, I'm a failure. If I stay, I'm a burden. Either way I feel like I'm not capable of becoming the Jedi Knight you want me to be…" Kotep shifted awkwardly in bed and avoided his master's eye contact.

"Kotep, I will never see you as a failure. You are strong and you are already so talented. Whichever decision you make, I have faith that it will be the best decision for you and you will succeed in whatever you wish to pursue." He seemed genuine. Kotep weakly reached out with the force to try and sense any doubt that Obi-Wan felt, he came up short. 

He raised his gaze, meeting Obi-Wan's eyes, a small glimmer of hope painted in his gaze.

Obi-Wan breathed deeply. "What would make you happy, Kotep." 

Kotep took a moment to really consider his options. Seeing his family would always make him happy, that's for certain, but he had to consider the long run. He had spent so long trying to get into the position he was in as a Padawan and he wasn't about to let that go so easily when he could still try.

"I want to stay…" he muttered, as if he were scared it was the wrong decision. He swallowed thickly and spoke louder, more certain. "I want to stay."

Obi-wan's eyes lit up as he allowed himself a moment of relief. He quickly swallowed down his feelings and gave Kotep a small smile, “I’m so glad. Do you want to tell,Master Windu or shall?” 

Kotep didn’t have it in him to talk to anyone else today so he left that task to his master. Obi-Wan placed a hand on Kotep’s shoulder for a brief moment before he left the room and unbeknownst to him, it did wonders to ease Kotep’s roiling mind.

Obi-Wan lay on his back on his bed in his quarters. He had his feet planted on the floor and he pressed his palms into his eyes, rubbing them roughly. He breathed out deeply and his hands fell to rest on his stomach. His eyes were closed and he was deep in thought when he heard his door open quietly. Obi-Wan went to stand up and recede back into his professional facade, but the moment he recognised the clone as Cody, all efforts ceased. 

Cody was in casual clothing, looking rather comfortable for once. A small section of bandages peaked out from underneath his shirt and Obi-Wan made the mental note to remind him to get them changed and refreshed tomorrow. Cody came to sit beside Obi-Wan in silence and then, with a grunt of discomfort, was laying down next to him in the bed. For a long while, they didn’t exchange any words, just laid together, wading into the comfortable silence they had created.

It was Obi-Wan who eventually broke the silence. 

“I wanted to thank you, Cody.” his voice was hardly above a whisper, there was no need for him to speak loudly in this situation and he was grateful for that.

Cody rolled his head to the side slowly to look Obi-Wan in the eyes, “What for?”

“Well, for everything but more specifically in regards to Kotep.If you weren’t there for him at the crash, he would be dead. I’ve always admired your quick thinking.” Obi-Wan smiled at him and Cody felt his heart flutter.

“It’s just good timing and luck, I suppose.” humble as ever, Cody deflected the complement.

Obi-Wan rolled his eyes and looked back up at the ceiling, smiling softly to himself. "Well, I thank the force for whatever circumstances took place that resulted in you being there."

"I'm glad Tep's okay…" Cody muttered.

Obi-Wan let the tension leave his body and he closed his eyes. "So am I…"

Cody watched Obi-Wan for a moment, silently studying his relaxed features. They had shared moments like this in the past, they were becoming more frequent these days and Cody wasn't sure what to feel. He knew the Jedi code. He knew that Jedi aren't allowed to have attachments. Cody was unwilling to face his emotions, because if it did lean more towards love than admiration, he wasn't ready to have his heartbroken by the code.

Cody's expression fell ever so slightly and he rose his gaze to the ceiling. 

The lights were out in the medical bay but Kotep was wide awake. He was trying to be silent, fighting off the urge to cry out in pain. He could feel a burning sensation in the place his leg should be. It burned like an invisible white fire that had caught alight in his bones and under his muscles. The pain had started to outweigh the desire to be noticed as least as possible in hopes of not being a burden, so he reached for the emergency intercom on his bedside table. 

"Kix, help… it burns..." Kotep choked though the pain and he felt hot tears sliding down his cheeks. 

Within moments he saw a light as Kix ran down the hall and was in his room. 

He was by his side quickly. Kix, the smart man he was, seemed to already catch onto what was happening the moment Kotep started trying to clutch at his missing leg. 

"Kotep, I'm going to give you some pain medication and inject you with a narcotic, you're going to get very sleepy but don't panic. It'll ease the pain and help you get through the night. I can prescribe proper medication for this in the morning. Okay?" Kix was already holding up a syringe. 

Kotep, starting to sweat, just nodded furiously, eager to get rid of this pain, "okay…" 

Kix pulled Koteps sleeve up and pressed the needle into his skin. Kotep felt a warmth spread throughout his arm and down to his fingertips.

The wave of sleepiness hit him like a speeder. Suddenly it was hard to keep his eyes open. He was still in pain but it was slowly fading and falling to the back of his mind. A sticky patch was stuck onto his stomach and he could vaguely register Kix talking about a medicated strip that he'd replace in the morning with something better. Kotep didn't mind, he felt the pain ease every so slightly. His mind was drifting. He felt Kix's hand rest on his forehead for a moment, taking his temperature the old fashioned way, before his eyes slid shut and he was gone. Kotep's body was heavy with sleep and he happily followed it.

Kix sighed, worried about the kid, before pulling the blankets up over him and leaving the room, closing the door gently behind him. 

**Author's Note:**

> God I really hope this doesn't flop, I know oc fics don't do that will on here but I've been working on this since November of 2019 and I've been so scared to post it. But here's my sweet boy Kotep, and his story of recovery.


End file.
